My email program does not "delete" messages or "empty" the trash. No. My email purges. I know it is socially insensitive for me to think the idea of my email having an eating disorder is hysterically funny, but, hey, I'm pretty socially insensitive, so I laugh my CLA off every time I hit purge.
I should get my email some counseling. Send it on Doctor Phil to talk about its self-image. And while I'm at it, I should enroll myself. You see, faithful reader, I have an editing disorder.
I avoid editing. My editing fasts can last for months. I write stacks and stacks of fresh, newly minted manuscripts and set them aside to be edited later. Much later. Then once or twice a year, when my To-Be-Edited pile gets precariously tall, I binge on editing. Punishing myself with a glut of it.
I'm in an editing binge now.
"What's this?" you ask. "Aren't you doing NaNo? There's no editing in NaNo!"
I know. And I am doing NaNo. Or rather, I will be (hopefully), just as soon as I get this editing monkey off my back.
You see, October was my designated Month o' Editing Masochism and I didn't finish gutting and filleting one of my older manuscripts the way I wanted to. Did you see that Grey's Anatomy with Anatomy Jane, the doll with the removable organs? That's what my book looks like right now. An empty body cavity. The organs are all strewn around my apartment on ice, waiting to be put back inside. Now, you may say the metaphor is flawed, that my story isn't going to die if I leave the plot devices on ice indefinitely, and maybe you're the kind of person who can walk away from surgery with the guts hanging out, but I'm not. I can't.
Now if only I could remember which order to put them back in, so this puppy doesn't end up breathing out of its stomach.
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1 comment:
I'm amused by the intensity of the term "Purge." It seems awfully descriptive for a digital action.
Similarly, the "Delete Forever" option, and the ubiquitous "Are you SURE you want to do this? This action cannot be undone" make me a little nervous. I guess I'm not SURE. Oh, well in that case, I'd better reconsider. In fact, let me consult a few other people before deleting this email.
Also, I am generally amused when Netscape asks me if I want to "close tabs" because then I think of keeping close tabs on things. Every time. Not that this is particularly funny, but I giggle nonetheless.
perhaps this is a dissertation-worthy topic.
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