I love this article in the Huffington Post about love and marriage and our societal expectations of both.
I know romance novels take a lot of flack for being part of the irrational-fairy-tale-building-up-love-as-a-fantasy problem, but I think the best romance novels (if you really read them rather than just venting about them after a glance at the sexy man-chest cover and steamy back-cover copy) are about love as a verb, just like this guy is talking about. About how it is something we have to learn to do, not just feel. (And I'm not talking about sex, you gutter-minded darlings.) It's about getting past your own pre-conceived notions about what emotion is supposed to be, and learning that it isn't always pretty, there's almost always sacrifice involved, but it's a choice. A choice the characters make. To do love right. (In the end. There will be lots of drama to get them there.)
At least that's what I see, in the best of our industry. So maybe we aren't part of the problem. Maybe we're part of the solution.
I know romance novels take a lot of flack for being part of the irrational-fairy-tale-building-up-love-as-a-fantasy problem, but I think the best romance novels (if you really read them rather than just venting about them after a glance at the sexy man-chest cover and steamy back-cover copy) are about love as a verb, just like this guy is talking about. About how it is something we have to learn to do, not just feel. (And I'm not talking about sex, you gutter-minded darlings.) It's about getting past your own pre-conceived notions about what emotion is supposed to be, and learning that it isn't always pretty, there's almost always sacrifice involved, but it's a choice. A choice the characters make. To do love right. (In the end. There will be lots of drama to get them there.)
At least that's what I see, in the best of our industry. So maybe we aren't part of the problem. Maybe we're part of the solution.
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