Too Much Freedom

Hello, boys and girls. Are you having a happy new year?

This year, in the season of newfound (and often all-too-temporary) resolve, I find myself in an unusual position. I'm trying to plan for the new year, really I am, but I can't seem to make up my mind what I want 2010 to bring... which makes it a lot harder to plan for it.

I'm gonna be writing, I know that much. But where will I live? Will I be traveling or will I settle somewhere for a while? Stay here in Alaska or bounce off to my next nomadic destination? Which has more appeal: A desk with all my writing stuff set up around it or a laptop on a plane? I don't know!

I love being able to plot and plan my future - even if life reroutes my plans more often than not. This not-knowing, not-planning, plotless phase I'm in has me all tangled up and uneasy. I have designed my life around having the freedom to do whatever I want, but what happens when you don't know what you want?

I feel like these decisions would be so much easier if I had stricter parameters - a job that required me to stay in one place, a mortgage, a spouse, two-point-two kids. Having none of these, I am footloose, fancy-free, and utterly confused.

Is there such a thing as too much freedom? Decisions can seem so much harder when the only determining factor is whim. (And you may now throw rotten tomatoes or any other unsavory edible you can find at me. I know I am spoiled beyond belief to be complaining about having too many choices. Whine, whine, whine.)

So what should I do? What would you do? Flit around the globe? Or should I plant myself in the hopes that some of life's delightful roots might finally manage to tangle themselves around me? Do I have to stand still for the spouse/mortgage/kids life to catch up to me?

Boston? Chicago? Sydney? London? Lubock? Advise me. I'm begging here. What should my new year bring?