Sexual Skimmers

Brace yourselves, boys and girls. I feel a rant coming on. I'm up in arms today about sex scenes in romance novels.

Over at Dear Author, there is a poll/post/conversation/whatever about whether or not you, as a reader, skim over or skip the sex scenes in the novels you read. The comment thread is particularly interesting as various viewpoints weigh in. I, personally, am of the non-skimming variety - but I don't skim anything when I read. (Even Portrait of an Artist as a Young Man. I read every single word and I freaking hated that book.)

I think if the author is doing his or her job, you shouldn't want to skim. Ever. When you are tempted to skim, isn't it a sign that something is unnecessary? That it doesn't work or it isn't a part of the whole? Sex scenes, like any scene in the book, shouldn't be gratuitous. They should advance the plot, develop the characters, and be a sign of conflict or resolution in action. That is what makes them satisfying to me - not the mechanics.

If you automatically skim through a certain type of scene, assuming it will be no more than Tab A into Slot B then don't you run the risk of missing some poignant, character-altering moment the author has embedded into that moment? Some authors do fall into formula, but others brings something vibrant & fresh to each new scene - sexual or otherwise. My God, the idea of skipping a Jenny Crusie sex scene is a pure horror to me! She's so exquisitely brilliant! Skipping? Never! (See also: Mary Hughes, Emma Holly, Eloisa James, etc...)

And you know what makes no sense to me at all? If so many people are skimming the sex scenes, then why are hotter books selling better? Publishers aren't seeking out heat just because they have a secret kink they're trying to foist on the reading public. Those books sell. So are people buying the hot & erotic romance novels only to skim virtuously over the steamy passages? Or is it a case of buying the magazine for the articles and denying any knowledge of the dirty pictures in the fold out section?

Well, if that's the case, I fully admit to looking at the centerfolds. (Sorry, gran.) I like a beautiful written turn of phrase that captures the feeling of a moment - whether it is sexual, comedic, romantic or all of the above. And you know what drives me up-the-freaking-wall? When I get two hundred pages of steamy, detailed build-up only to have the bedroom door slammed in my face.

A deftly-handled fade away is lovely (see: Just the Sexiest Man Alive by Julie James), but if you are describing the sizzley, tingley, oh-baby-I-need-you tension in the car on the drive home in one paragraph and the first sentence of the next paragraph is "The sex was good" then you will hear my scream of "What in the freaking hell was that?" resounding throughout the house. You threw me out of the story. There is leaving it to the reader's imagination (good) and then there is evicting your reader from the premises at a crucial moment (bad).

A writer's goal should be to keep the reader inside the story, engaged and making him or herself at home. But sex just complicates everything, it seems. Will the fact of a sex scene make a reader skim? Or will the jarring lack of one toss the reader out just as readily?

You tell me. Do you skim sex scenes? Do you (gasp!) skip mine? Are you more inclined to be enraged by an unsatisfying climax (har) or by a heavy preponderance (yeah, I said it preponderance!) of unnecessary sex scenes?

My take? To paraphrase Marie Antoinette, Let there be sex! But please, let it be well-written.